I'm typing this without looking. I'm laying on my floor because I got tired of sitting at my desk chair. It was really strange sprawling out on the floor and finding out that I can feel the central air flowing from the vent near my baseboard. I never thought the air worked in my room, that just went out the window. All afternoon I have been playing Trivial Pursuiton Youtube.
So, the first day of Senior year, eh? Robert and I took the obligatory picture by the door in our uniforms and then headed to the car. Maggie ran smoothly and we put my TMBG Here Come the 123s CD in because you know, that's just the way we roll. Of course, Robert being anxious and me being in the sort of mood that takes to flight rather than sitting waiting pondering, we left the house super early. We drove up to school with 0 traffic and the radio up super loud. We were the first students there and only a little earlier than most of the teachers. Except for of course Mr. Scarborough who is a robot. I parked perfectly, and I was so glad. I, being a party pooper, rained on Robert's parade and sat in the car for a good 20 minutes. When I finally decided to go inside it was surprisingly easy to fake cheerfulness. I feel like I can mask anything with a smile. Shortly more people I knew showed up and it wasn't terrible. I went to homeroom (late because of bus duty, ugh) and it is history class/senior seminar. We sat and laughed and I really like the people in that class. Mr. Mulqueen showed us his own movie twist on Batman about Alfred being Bruce's mentor and made the connection that as we became super heroes, he would be our fearless guide. I like that. I have my own Alfred. AP Lit and Comp was next. Out of the 5 summer reading books I still have 2 1/2 to read and can't see anytime in the near future when I will have a chance to finish them. So that scared me a bit when I saw how extraordinarily fast paced our syllabus is. We average a novel a week! holy crow. In AP Calc we had a "pre-test" that was ridiculous and we all failed. I hate that class. oh joyousness. I have also realized that I probably won't be eating lunch most days this year because of the schedule and how I always have to be in 2 places at once, on quite a regular basis. Naval Science was made bearable only by the fact that Master Chief is awesome. He told us anecdotes involving eating shark ("What does it taste like? Well Mr. Abdullah, it tastes like shark.") and riding a horse named Sugar to high school one day. I feel like I can really learn a lot from him. He told us about being a single parent and that his daughter is his first priority, her happiness, safety, shelter, well being, etc. I almost cried because I wish he was my dad. He's just that cool. I had to drop gym for Spanish and got to endure the joy of waiting for our "Dean of Mean" to get through the line of scheduling issues. She has the worst attitude in the world. So that was it for the day. I pushed through. It's definitely going to be a rough year, but I knew that before I woke up this morning and I am coming to terms with it.
On our way home we stopped at Wawa and I, dressed of course in my windchime, jingle jangle ooh ahh medals uniform was gazed upon with some very inquisitive looks. Upon exiting the store a mother with her daughter walked past and she exclaimed that I must be a good role model for having all of these medals and "What do they mean? I'd love if you'd tell my daughter what a good role model is." So we got to talking and I found out that the girl is in 5th grade and home schooled, they are Christian and have been praying for someone whose mom I know. It was really uplifting to be recognized as a role model to a young girl. I was shocked, but honored. I expressed that I am also a Christian and I think I did a good job of being God's witness. I am proud of myself today.
This morning I started a new routine. I wake up at 5 and turn on my light, do some necessary getting ready and then sit at my desk, still in my jammies and read the daily reading from Pureby Rebecca St. James and A Year With C.S. Lewis. Having the inspiration and motivation of His word in the morning is really helpful to me and I pray that I can keep it up. I love the feeling of having a good message in my head, as my armor for the trials of the day. It is wonderful.
However, on the subject of routines, I know that this energy will not last. In a week, or maybe not even, I will be coming home, dropping my bags and curling up into bed or on the couch. School is draining. I find no source of energy after 4pm and it's awful. It's something that I plan on conquering this year. I plan on succeeding at staying organized and driven. I'm ready. (Motto? haha)
Here's what I keep singing to myself (It's from the youtube musical A Very Potter Sequel):"I'm the smartest person that I've ever met
So why do I allow myself to possibly forget
There's so much I know how to do; so much more than all of you
The only thing I wish I knew was how to make them see the girl that I can be.
I am the coolest girl in the whole wide world
I know it but can't show it at all
I am sick and tired of low not higher places where I belong
It's about time I proved them wrong.
Give me a shot to show what I've got!
I'm a helluva whole lot more than this frizzy hair,
these frumpy clothes I wear,
though I rock 'em like nobody you've seen before
'Cause I am
the coolest girl in the whole wide world
I know it
below it all."
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